My Diary: Watching My Reflection With A Spinning Top On My Head

Gerald's Rather Strange Diary

I got up with the head of a spider monkey and the tail of a raccoon‭; ‬June remained in bed talking of redecorating the zoo.‭ ‬After a breakfast of old pictures I walked the dog along the sharpened edge of a razor,‭ ‬painted a clown’s face black and then went to lunch with myself and June.‭ ‬We both ate minutes instead of food before being served a meal of ball bearings and brake fluid.‭ ‬I came home to sew badges onto flying carpets while June stayed in town garlanding shopping malls with conversation.‭ ‬She came home eventually as the contents of a hypodermic syringe‭; ‬being injected into the living room (which was wearing Boer War camouflaged stockings and green vegetables freshly grown in the Crimea).‭ ‬I saluted like a Great Western Railway signal and poured boiling hot tea from a ball point pen.

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