My Diary: Fussing An Elephant On A Cat Bed

Gerald's Rather Strange Diary

I got up wearing the wrong head‭; ‬it took me sometime to find the right one as it was hiding behind the washing machine.‭ ‬June was playing the flute in the refrigerator after losing her voice in a vacuum flask just before Sir Edmund Hilary took it to the summit of Everest.‭ ‬I was exploring the deepest diamond mine in the World at the time and got very excited when I found a lump of coal.‭ ‬I couldn’t work in my studio as it had regressed into a child’s swing‭; ‬instead I sat watching a frowning face finally smile.‭ ‬As the afternoon aged I went into the garden to stand quite still while marble statues ran around everywhere.‭ ‬I moved when they finally stopped,‭ ‬coming in with a garland of barbed wire and machine emplacements round my neck‭ ‬-‭ ‬June was cooking in a minefield.

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